Broccoli and Chicken Biryani ( Easy Rice cooker method )

By now most of you would have guessed that I am still trying to get my family to embrace Broccoli ( and they keep running away this superfood which they regard as some green headed Hydra). But not one to give up so easily, I tried incorporating it in salads, pasta, stir fry and then finally the crowd favorite 'Biryani'.

This one is a simple low-calorie and high fiber version that I cooked in that magical appliance called the rice cooker. I have a Panasonic one and it is a life saver when BESCOM is not playing truant. Have to pick up the kid or run down to the nearest kirana for something (yes, I still do that in the age of apps like BigBasket, Grofers and Zopnow coz I am a human and very much susceptible to short term memory outages when compiling those mile long grocery lists) ? No probs. It switches off automatically when the rice /curry is done. Only catch is that, since it does not employ artificial intelligence, the 'done' thing is determined by the water content. So, if you put less water, it switches off rather than burning down the contents of the cooking pan.

Ok. Getting back to my recipe, it is just comprises of throwing in everything (except rice) into one big marinating bowl and then cooking it in the rice cooker. Saves time and effort. And it save Calories too. (I know I am being lazy but I have a stack of books that I badly want to complete)

Read on -

Preparation Time - 25 mins (plus 1 hr for marination)

Ingredients -

• 1 cup chicken pieces (medium sized)
• 1 1/2 cup Broccoli pieces
• 1 1/2 cup Basmati rice
• 1 medium sized onion (chopped into thin long pieces)
• 1 1/2 tsp GG paste
• 1/2 tsp Garlic paste
• 1/4 cup thick yogurt
• 1 medium tomato (finely chopped)
• 4 tbsp chopped coriander leaves
• 1/4 tsp garam masala
• 1/4 coriander powder
• 2 pinch turmeric
• whole spices ( 1 inch cinnamon, 1 green cardamom, 2 cloves, 1 bay leaves, a small piece of mace )
• 2 tsp oil
• 1 tsp ghee
• salt to taste

Preparation - Wash and cut the broccoli into medium sized florets. Put them under running water to wash away any insects and eggs. Then soak in warm water to which some turmeric has been added.

Wash the chicken pieces. Transfer to a mixing bowl. Add the broccoli and all the remaining ingredients except rice, ghee and oil. Keep aside for 1 hour.

Cooking - Switch on the rice cooker. Add the oil and wait for it to heat up. Add the whole spices.

Once they release their fragrance, add the marinated chicken and broccoli. Cook uncovered till the chicken is half done.

Wash the rice and add to the rice cooker. Add 2 cups water. Adjust salt and ghee.

Close the lid. The rice cooker will automatically switch off when it is done.

Quick Fix Pasta ( and some womanly gyaan on PMS blues )

Most women would agree with me when I say that we all could do without those crazy PMS symptoms. While a few lucky ones get away with minor mood swings, some of us end up becoming quite crabby and downright depressed. Personally speaking, those hormones make me take up the broom/mop/duster or whatever cleaning aid that I have at hand and go on a cleaning spree. But some of my friends suffer from worse predicament like bloating (damn..do I need to buy another pair of jeans just for those few days?) or they feel the need to keep munching/snacking constantly.

Now, while it is not possible to completely alleviate the symptoms, following a few simple rules makes it manageable. For example -

1. Reduce salt intake and increase the fiber intake - Most fried snacks are high on salt so they need to go off the menu. Also, it is a better idea to replace rice with daliya or pasta which are higher in fiber content.

2. Drink loads of warm water - It flushes out the system and reduces bloating.

3. Include herbs like garlic, ginger and basil in your diet .

4. EVOO works like a magic potion. Do try adding some to your salads and pasta.

5. Citrus fragrance is one great mood lifter plus the juice works as a detox agent. Go leverage both.

6. Exercise or even better, try yoga.

Ok. So, we are done with the gyaan. Lets move on to this simple recipe that actually uses some of the ingredients I have listed above -

Preapartion Time - 15 mins

Ingredients -

• 100 gm Delmonte spaghetti
• 1 cup broccoli floret
• 3-4 fat garlic flakes
• 1/2 tsp chili flakes
• 1 tbsp EVOO
• 6-7 Italian basil leaves
• rind of 1 lemon
• salt 

Preparation - Wash broccoli florets under a tap. Then dunk into warm water for 5 mins. Any remaining insects or larvae will float up to the surface.

Cooking - Take water in a large saucepan. Get it to the bubbling point. Add salt.

Throw in the broccoli florets. Remove after a min and put into cold water.

Add the spaghetti to the same water. Cook till al-dente. Tip the saucepan contents into a colander and give it a gentle shake.

Put a wok on the burner. When it is warm to touch, add EVOO . Also add the chopped garlic and chili flakes. Just when the garlic starts to change color, add broccoli florets and spaghetti.

Toss for 2 mins before adding the grated lemon rind and shredded (by hand) basil.

Remove from burner and serve.

Loving Foodz ? Then Try Living Foodz !!

Just as the average Indian has discovered the joys of travelling and acquired an experimental palate, the time is ripe to reinvent the way one looks at food. From being a basic necessity in the league of 'roti, kapda aur makaan', food is now a trending entity that fuels the imagination of a million plus Indians. Hence the need for a foodtainment channel that caters to the ever growing need of amalgamating food with changing lifestyles but still retaining that very fabric of Indian-ness. And thankfully, the search has to an end.

Food Nirvana. A holistic approach to food. Food as the very extension of lifestyle. Food that is fun, vibrant and very very hip. If you have been looking for all that, then it's got to be 'Living Foodz', the latest foodtainment and lifestyle channel that will have you hooked from day one. Well, din't someone say travelling and fooding around go hand in hand ? Never mind if you have never heard of it !

The 'Living Foodz' channel is about to revamp our outlook towards food and entertainment. Food now goes beyond the kitchens and touches upon local cultures and traditions as well. Yep, sounds like a complete package and a lot more fun too. And there are loads and loads of health and wellness related tips and recipes for keeping you in great shape even as you learn to cook some sumptuous food.

Take a adventurous road trip with Gautam Mehrishi on 'Chef on wheels' as he explores divine food in the unknown reaches of India's interiors. If farm fresh produce excites you to no end and the mystery of the open kitchens of rural India mesmerize you, then this is a must watch for you. This is one series that has left me all nostalgic about the childhood trips to my grandmother's village even by looking at the promos.

But if you happen to be more inclined towards city hopping, join the dashing Ranveer Brar as he explores the 'gallis' and 'nukkads' of India on 'The Great Indian Rasoi 2'. Whether it is drooling over the sinful kebab's at Kareem's or grabbing a mouthful of tantalizing Aloo tikki chaat in Delhi, or sampling the Hyderabadi Dum Biryani and Shawrama rolls in Hyderabad, this bubbly anchor sure gives you an eyeful !

And if that does not satisfy the food and travel enthusiast in you, go globe trotting without a passport with the inimitable Vicky Ratnani as he takes you on a gastronomic world tour right from the confines of his kitchen on 'Vickypedia' or 'taste ka encyclopedia' as he puts it.

Did I just forget the raucous twosome of Rocky and Mayur ? Well, they continue to stir up food and fun, both in equal measures, on 'Food Express', an all new show.

All this and much more is waiting for you when 'Living Foodz' goes live on 11th September. Be sure to save the reminders and wait for the fun as it unfolds the foodie way. You can also check their Facebook and Twitter pages for regular updates !!

Stay tuned for 'Living Foodz' where food is all about fun and more !!

Ulli Sambar ( Spicy lentil cooked with Shallots )

Shallots or the tiny onions have a sweet and mild flavour. They Southern states of India, especially Kerala and Tamil Nadu employ a lot of shallots in their cooking while it is eaten mostly raw in the Eastern State of Odisha, mainly as an accompaniment for the watery rice dish of Pakhala.

Since, I bought a large lot of shallots for Onam, I was left with more than a handful even after I had finished with the Sadya which involved some marathon cooking. After making rasam the other day, I felt like having some delicious Ulli Sambar for lunch yesterday. It is just like any other sambar but no other vegetables should be added as the shallots have a very mild flavour. However I do add some carrots and a bit of a tomato .

Read on for the recipe -

Preparation Time - 25-30 mins

Ingredients -

• a fistful of toor dal
• 1/2 cup peeled shallots
• 1/4 cup diced carrots
• 1 medium sized tomato
• a lemon sized ball of tamarind
• 1 tsp sambar masala
• 1 sprig curry leaves
• 2-3 green chilis
• 1//2 tsp mustard seeds
• a large pinch of asafoetida
• a small pinch of fenugreek seeds
• salt to taste
• 4 tsp oil

Preparation - Soak the tamarind with 1 cup hot water for 10 mins. Squeeze out the juice and discard pulp.

Cooking - Wash and cook the dal with 2 cups water in a pressure cooker. Also add the carrots and tomato to the pressure cooker. Remove from flame after 2-3 whistles.

Keep aside till steam escapes. Open the lid and mash the dal.

Heat 2 tsp oil in a pan. Add the green chilis, half of the curry leaves and the shallots. Fry for 3-4 mins.

Add the fried shallots to the mashed dal along with the tamarind water and the sambar masala.

Let it boil for 10-15 mins till the shallots are tender and the raw smell of tamarind goes away.

Heat the remaining oil . Add the mustard seeds, fenugreek seeds, asafoetida, curry leaves and dry red chilis. Fry for 30 secs before pouring it over the dal.

Serve hot with white rice , curd and some appalam.

Gopalkala (Janmashtami Special)

"Haathi Ghora Palki, Jai Kanhaiya Lal Ki" - A very Happy Janmashtami to all my readers !!


Today's recipe is a simple yet delicious dish that is usually offered to Lord Krishna on his birthday. Most of you would be aware that milk products are the Lord's weakness and so most of his offering incorporate atleast one type of milk derivative. This one for example makes use of curd and buttermilk, but some folks do substitute the latter with some milk. The other major ingredient is 'poha' or chuda which is symbolic of his friendship with the poor Sudama.

Read on for the recipe -

Preparation Time - 10 mins

Ingredients -

• 1 cup poha /chuda/rice flakes
• 1/2 cup grated coconut
• 1/2 cup chopped cucumber
• 4-5 tbsp buttermilk
• 4-5 tbsp curd
• 1/2 tsp chopped ginger
• 1/4 tsp cumin seeds
• 2-3 chopped green chilis
• 1 tbsp ghee
• salt to taste
• a sprig of curry leaves
• 1 tsp sugar (optional)

Preparation - Wash and soak poha for 2-3 mins. Drain for another 5 mins.

Take it in a mixing bowl and add chopped chilis, coconut, buttermilk and curd. Season with salt. Mix well.

Heat ghee for tempering. Add curry leaves and cumin seeds. Pour this spluttering mix over the contents of the mixing bowl.

Mix well and serve.

Broccoli Stir Fry ( Doing it the Odia way!!)

When it comes to exotic veggies, the culinary experts almost always advice folks to stick to the native method of cooking with a little tweak here or there. Subtle flavours, they say, get masked by the heavy use of spices which dominate Indian cooking.

But in the process, they render the veggies almost unpalatable. And this is especially true when it comes to the older generation. Try serenading your MIL with a zucchini boat or a broccoli soup. Chances are that they would blanch at the very mention of such a dish. 

However some of these veggies are quite loaded with mineral. For example, Broccoli scores quite a few points over cauliflower when it comes to the count of vitamins and minerals. So, I was in no mood to forgo the nutrition provided by this superfood. 

This is one great yet simple recipe where I have cooked Broccoli using a typically Odia method of preparation. Read on for the recipe -

Preparation Time - 20 mins (Broccoli takes a little less time to cook as compared to cauliflower)

Ingredients -

• 1 medium sized Broccoli
• 1 medium sized potato
• 1 large tomato
• 2 small onions
• 2 dry red chillis
• 1 tsp red chilli powder
• 1 tsp ginger garlic paste
• 1/3 tsp garam masala
• a pinch of cumin seeds
• a pinch of turmeric
• salt
• 3 tsp rice bran oil

Ingredients - Cut the broccoli into medium sized bits. Dice the potato into 8 parts.

The onion should be cut into thin long strips. Chop the tomato into fine bits.

Cooking - Heat a wok. Add 2 tsp oil. Add the broccoli florets along with salt and turmeric. Stir fry for 7-8 mins on medium to high flame or till the florets are almost cooked. Remove from pan and keep aside.

Heat a wok. Pour the remaining oil into it. Add the cumin seeds and red chilli followed by the onions. Stir fry till the onions turn golden. Add the ginger garlic paste and cook for 3-4 mins till the raw smell goes off.

Add the chopped tomato. Sprinkle red chilli powder and a little salt. Cover with a lid and cook till the tomatoes soften.

Add the fried broccoli and mix with the rest of the ingredients. Cook for a few mins while taking care that the broccoli is not overcooked.

Add the garam masala and mix well. Remove from the flame.

Serve hot with rotis or white rice.

Click here to read the original recipe using cauliflower.

Guda Khiri / Gur Payesh (Rice pudding with Jaggery)

Kheer. Kheeri. Payesh. Payasam. Each corner of the country has its own name and version(s) for the delectable rice pudding. While sugar is the sweetening agent of choice for most folks, there is a tribe that swears by the rich flavor that can only be imparted by 'Gur/Guda/Jaggery'.

While the 'guda kheeri' has been on my list for sometime, I was waiting to lay my hands on some good quality 'palm jaggery', which is the best among all varieties of jaggery that one finds in the market. And I was lucky to come by it last weekend.

Read on for the recipe -

Preparation Time - 1 hr 30 mins

Ingredients -

• 1 liter milk
• a fistful of jeera rice/basmati rice
• 3-4 tbsp condensed milk
• palm jaggery (as per taste)
• assorted nuts
• 1 tsp ghee

Preparation - Bring the milk to a boil.

Wash and add the rice to the boiling milk along with the ghee. Once the rice is cooked, add the condensed milk and nuts. Let it boil for 5-6 mins more.

Finally dissolve the jaggery in some milk to check if it curdles the milk. If not, then add the jaggery in small quantities and keep stirring till you get the desired sweetness.

Remove from the flame.

Allow to cool before serving.

Onasadya Series (Part 3)

The final part of the Onasadya series ...

Onam is synonymous with the 'Pookalam' or elaborate flower arrangements in every household . Big floral carpets are made with a variety of flowers in different colors. Most 'pookalams' are artistic ones and there are even competitions to pick out the best among them.

Today I am making a spicy curry with shallots ( this theeyal is among my favorites ), a coconut milk based mild curry and a simple mix veg stir fry !!

Ulli Theeyal

Preparation Time - 25 mins

Ingredients -

• 2 pinch fenugreek seeds
• 2 pinch cumin seeds
• 2 pinch black pepper seeds
• 2 pinch coriander seeds
• 3-4 tsp grated coconut
• 2 dry red chili
• pinch of turmeric
• 3 tsp oil 
• 14-15 shallots (peeled)
• 1 dry red chili
• 2 pinch fenugreek seed
• a sprig of curry leaves
• 2 tsp tamarind paste
• 1 tsp jaggery
• pinch of asafoetida
• 2 garlic flakes (crushed) (I prefer to omit it)
• 2 tsp oil
• salt to taste

Preparation - Heat 3 tsp oil in a pan. Add the fenugreek, cumin, pepper, mace, clove, cinnamon and coriander. Roast till they give off a fragrance. Then add coconut and fry it to a brown color. Finally add red chili and turmeric and remove from flame after a few seconds.

Grind into a mixture once the spices have cooled down a bit.

Cooking - Heat the remaining oil in a wok. Add red chili and mustard seeds. Add the curry leaves and shallots and fry for a minute.

Add the ground pasta and tamarind pasta along with 3-4 tbsp water.

After 2 mins, add jaggery, garlic, asafoetida and salt.

Cook for a few mins and then remove from the flame.

Serve once cool. 

Olan

Preparation Time - 25 mins

Ingredients -

• 2 cups ash gourd
• a handful of beans (use any variety)
• 2-3 green chilis
• 2-3 chopped shallots (optional)
• 1/2 tsp chopped ginger (optional)
• a pinch of mustard seeds (optional)
• a sprig of curry leaves
• 1 cup thick coconut milk
• salt to taste
• 2 tsp oil

Preparation - Wash and soak the beans overnight.

Cooking - Cook the beans with a little salt in a pressure cooker for 3-4 whistles.

Heat the oil in a pan. Add curry leaves, ginger, mustard seeds and green chilis. Follow this with the shallots. Fry till translucent.

Add the ash gourd pieces along with salt and a little water. Cook covered till soft.

Add the cooked beans along with thick coconut milk. Cook for 5 mins more.

Remove from the flame and serve warm.

Note - I added some red chili to the tempering and that caused the milky white olan to get this yellowish tinge. Most people just cook the olan without any tempering (a few green chili and curry leaves are boiled with the ash gourd) and drizzle the coconut oil right at the end.

Thoran

Preparation Time - 15 mins


Ingredients -

• 3 cups finely chopped cabbage
• 1/2 cup finely chopped carrot
• 1/2 cup finely chopped beans
• 5-6 finely chopped shallots
• 1/2 cup grated coconut
• 1 sprig curry leaves
• 1-2 chopped green chili
• 2 pinch turmeric
• 2 tsp oil
• 1 dry red chili
• a pinch of asafoetida
• 1/4 tsp mustard seeds
• salt to taste

Preparation - Mix all the ingredients in a bowl except for oil, salt, red chili, asafoetida and mustard seeds.

Let it sit for 20 mins.

Cooking - Heat the oil in a wok . Add mustard seeds, asafoetida and red chili. Once seeds start spluttering, add the vegetables . Sprinkle salt.

Mix well and cook covered for 10 mins or till done. Remember to give a quick stir every 3-4 mins.

Remove from wok and serve.

Onasadya Series (Part 2)

Continuing the Onasadya series...

Sadya or banquet always refers to a traditional vegetarian meal served on a plantain leaf. It incorporates all tastes like sweet, sour, bitter, salty, astringent and pungent/spicy. While some districts prefer to use the pink/red Matta rice in the Sadya, others use the white rice.

One of the biggest attractions of Onam, which is actually a 4 day state holiday in Keralal, is the snake boat race or Vallamkali ( it is still in my bucket list and looks like it will remain so for another year atleast ) !! Along with the annual rice harvest, the celebration also commemorates the annual visit of the Asura king Mahabali who was relegated to the underworld by the Vamana avatar of Lord Vishnu. Slightly diverging from the topic, I would like to add that Mahabali still commands a lot of respect in Kerala and is not the devil incarnate as people from North assume him to be. Those who like books can actually try reading Asura by Anand Neelakantan . It is a beautiful book about the 'asura' way of life and is sure to change your perceptions.

Coming back to the food, it is the very popular Avial (mix veg) along with the sweet and sour dishes of puli inji and pacchadi. Read on -

Avial

Preparation Time - 30 mins

Ingredients -

• 1 raw banana
• 1 carrot
• 7-8 beans
• 1-2 drumstick 
• 1 potato
• 1/2 cup yellow cucumber
• 1/2 cup pumpkin
• a few pieces of raw mango
• 1 tbsp curd
• 1 cup grated coconut
• a pinch of cumin seeds
• 2 green chilis
• 2 pinch turmeric
• salt to taste
• 1/5 mustard seeds
• 2 sprig curry leaves
• 2 tsp oil

Preparation - Cut all the vegetables into long pieces.

Grind the grated coconut with cumin seeds and green chilis.

Cooking - Boil 2 cups water in a wok. First add the carrot, green banana, potato, yellow cucumber and beans. Let it boil till half cooked.

Then add the drumsticks, pumpkin and raw mangoes. Sprinkle the turmeric. Boil till all the veggies are soft.

Add the ground coconut and cook for a few minutes.

Remove from the flame and add the curd. Stir well and return to flame. Cook for 3-4 mins.

Heat the oil in a tempering pan. Add curry leaves , mustard seeds and cumin seeds. Pour the tempering over the vegetables and mix in.


Puli Inji

Preparation Time - 20 mins

Ingredients -

• 1/4 cup finely chopped ginger
• 5-6 finely chopped green chillis
• a lime sized ball of tamarind
• 4-5 tbsp powdered jaggery
• 1 tsp mustard seeds
• 4 tsp oil
• a pinch of asafoetida
• a sprig of curry leaves
• 2 pinch turmeric
• Salt to taste

Preparation - Soak the tamarind in hot water for 30  minutes. Squeeze and extract the juice.Throw the pulp.
Wash and peel the ginger. Chop finely along with the green chillis.

Cooking - Heat the oil in a wok. Add the mustard seeds followed by the curry leaves.
Add the chopped ginger and green chillis. Fry on medium flame for 2-3 mins till light brown.

Add the tamarind juice, turmeric powder, asafoetida powder and salt to taste. Boil for 3 to 4 minutes on medium flame.

Finally add the jaggery and allow to boil till the consistency becomes thick and saucy.
Remove from stove and allow it to cool down. Goes best with curd rice.

Store in an airtight container in the fridge and it will last for a month.


Pacchadi

Preparation Time - 15 mins

Ingredients -

• 2 cup chopped yellow cucumber
• 3-4 finely chopped shallots
• 2-3 chopped green chillis
• 1/2 inch chopped ginger
• a sprig of curry leaves
• 1/2 cup grated coconut 
• 2 garlic flakes
• a pinch of cumin seeds
• 1/4 tsp powdered mustard seeds 
• 1 1/2 cup yogurt
• 2 tsp oil
• salt to taste

Preparation - Grind grated coconut with garlic and cumin seeds into a smooth paste. Beat the yogurt lightly and then add coconut paste to it.

Cooking - Heat the oil in a wok. Add chopped cucumber, shallots, ginger, green chili, torn curry leaves and salt. Add about 1/2 cup water and allow to cook till soft.

Remove from flame. Add the mustard powder and the yogurt-coconut paste. Mix thoroughly.

Return the wok to the flame. Keep stirring for about 5 mins and then remove from the flame once the raw smell goes away.

TO be continued...............

Onasadya Series (Part 1)

I am no expert when it comes to Kerala cuisine. The food from God's own country is quite delectable but goes up a few notches to turn into something heavenly during the Onam celebrations. I was first introduced to it during my school days when my best friend's family celebrated Onam. And so, when I set out to recreate the magic of the 'Onam Sadya', I took a lot of help from the cookbooks, blogs and of course my lovely next door Aunty. There might have been a few omissions as she hardly speaks Hindi and her English is not very good either.

I would have loved to do the whole thing (24-28 dishes) as it is a visual treat to watch all those colors come alive on a verdant canvas (banana leaf). But since I have a kid who is a handful and there is no helping hand, I decided to make it into a series. Apart from the regular sambar, rasam, avial and thoran, there are lots of special recipes that are cooked especially during Onam. Today's recipes are Erissery (a delectable Pumpkin curry) and Kalan Kerala Curry ( raw banana cooked in yogurt ) .

Read on for the recipes -

Erissery

Preparation Time - 20-25 min

Ingredients -

• 2 cups Pumpkin cubes
• 1/2 cup grated coconut 
• 2 pinch jeera seeds
• 2 garlic cloves
• 1 green chili
• 1 sprig curry leaves
• 2-3 shallots (finely chopped)
• 1/3 mustard seeds
• 1 red chili
• 1/4 turmeric 
• 2 tsp oil
• salt to taste

Cooking - Cook the pumpkin with salt and turmeric till the cubes soften. Mash the pieces with a spatula.

Grind the coconut with garlic, green chili, turmeric, pepper powder and jeera. Add to the wok and let it simmer for a few minutes.

Heat 2 tsp in a pan. Add the broken red chili and mustard seeds. Once they start spluttering, add the chopped shallots and curry leaves. Add about 1 tsp grated coconut. Fry till the onion and coconut turns brown.

Add to the pumpkin curry and mix together.

Serve with rice.

Kalan Kerala Curry

Preparation Time - 20 mins

Ingredients -

• 2 cups Raw banana
• 2 1/2 cups yogurt
• 1 cup grated coconut
• 1 green chili
• 1 pinch cumin seeds
• 2-3 shallots
• 1-2 dry red chili
• 1/4 tsp mustard seeds
• a pinch of fenugreek
• 1 sprig curry leaves
• 2 tsp oil
• 1/2 tsp turmeric
• 1/2 tsp pepper powder
• salt to taste

Preparation - Mix the raw banana slices with salt and turmeric.

Grind the coconut, shallots, green chili and cumin seeds into a smooth paste with 2 tsp water.

Whisk the yogurt and mix in the coconut paste.

Cooking - Cook the banana slices with 2 cups water and the pepper powder. Let it turn soft.

Remove from the flame and stir in the yogurt-coconut paste. Mix thoroughly.

Return it to the stove and cook with constant cooking till it steam starts to rise.

Heat the oil in a pan. Add red chili, fenugreek seeds and mustard seeds. Once it starts spluttering, add curry leaves. Pour it over the curry and mix in.

To be continued......

Food Woes Galore !!

Many many Apps ago, a young couple decided to ring in their one month anniversary with a movie and a dinner. As neither of them possessed any significant culinary skills, they were at the mercy of a cook, or Amma as they lovingly called her. A sweet old lady she did her best to accommodate their wishes when she was not foisting her idea of good food on them. The problem that was accentuated by the fact that neither understood each other's language. So, at times request for a khichdi produced a biryani or a simple 'baingan ka bharta' became 'baghara baingan'. Their initial bewilderment gave way to nonchalance which then turned in resignation after sometime. In short, they became immune to the surprises sprung on them by Amma. "At least the food is hot, fresh and passably good", they would tell everyone and a times, even themselves.

So, with the day being a special one, they wanted to do away with such surprises. Hence, the sweet old lady was given a day off in advance. The morning dawned all bright and sunny. The guy wanted to do something special for his lady and hence he decided to bring her breakfast in bed. Now the gal was feeling very lucky and had her hopes all soaring. But just then, her reverie was broken by the smell of something burning in the kitchen. She rushed to the scene of the crime just in time to see the guy struggling with a omelette which was stuck to the non-stick pan (??). The bread was still stuck in the toaster and it was definitely past the edible stage. Feeble attempts at a chocolate milkshake had resulted in a messed up counter and yielded a liquid concoction that resembled the muddy run-off after a particularly bad downpour. Still marveling at the special skills that could even make an omellete stick to the 'non-stick' pan, she did not take a moment longer to banish him from the kitchen.

Image courtesy : www.tripadvisor.co.uk

Image courtesy : www.sodahead.com

Cleaning up the mess took up most of the morning and by the time she was done, it was brunch time. After the morning debacle, they no longer had any inclination to put their culinary expertise to test. So, it was pizza to the rescue which thankfully gets delivered it 20 mins when the rain Gods are merciful. The hungry couple devoured most of it and refrigerated the leftovers.

Image courtesy : www.parkhillpizza.com

Cut to the evening. The movie started on time and tuned out to be eminently enjoyable. Such that they were left craving for more when it ended just after 9 pm. Their appetites had been whetted and all they wished for was a lovely dinner to conclude the evening. But their romantic thoughts quickly dissipated when they encountered the scene outside the multiplex. Exiting the parking lot, they joined the long queue of cars that were moving at a snail's pace. It had rained while they watched the movie and traffic had come to a complete standstill.

By the time they had negotiated their way though the ocean of slow moving traffic from Madhapur to Gachibowli, it was already 10:30 pm. And thanks to the incessant rainfall, none of the decent looking restaurants were open. After ducking in and out of lanes to find a place that was still open, they settled on a modest looking place called 'Raj Bar and Restaurant' (no reference to DDLJ but adding Raj to the name of every other establishment became quite fashionable thanks to the character essayed by SRK). However, it turned out to be a different story inside. The place was over-flowing with booze and strange looking patrons. They quickly located a table near the door (just in case any emergency arose) and gestured the lone waiter to come over. A liquor brochure was duly placed on their hands. When they insisted for the proper menu, a battered looking leaflet was handed over to them. Picking it up gingerly, partly to prevent it from disintegrating further and partly to avoid contact with whatever germs it harbored, the lady glanced over it. "Tandoori Chicken ?"."Khatam ho gaya". "Kadhai Paneer ?". "Khatam to gaya". "Chilli Chicken ?". "Hau. Time lagega". "Kitna time?". "Aadha ghanta lagega Sir". Now having spent a few years in Hyderabad, they were aware of the peculiar habit of the natives to underestimate everything ranging from a period of time to a specific distance. So, most of the time, 'aadha ghanta' stretched into hours while 'baju wali galli' referred to a lane more than half a kilometer away. Hence, keeping the time frame in mind and reconsidering the steadily thinning crowd in the restaurant, the couple decided to beat a hasty retreat.

It was now close to midnight and the downpour had significantly watered down their expectations. Their next stop was a tiny 'dhaba' that had an extremely limited menu which was displayed on a small blackboard. Battered Chickan - 80 Rupees. Tanduri Chickan - 110 Rupees. Tanduri Roti - 25 Rupees. Lassi - 50 Rupees. Dismissing any thoughts of cruelty that the chicken might have undergone and shrugging off the spelling errors, they ordered for a plate of Butter Chicken and tandoori rotis to go with it. With hunger playing tricks on their imagination, they visualized being served succulent pieces of chicken dunked into a aromatic red gravy and soft white rotis to go with it. Unfortunately the dish that appeared in front of them resembled bits of leftover chicken thrown into a serving bowl along with yesterday's gravy. In addition, an oil slick no less than 2 cm deep floated on top of it. The charred tandoori rotis perfectly complimented the disaster. Having no other option, they tried forcing a morsel into their mouth. It turned out to be full of chillis and they had to order lassi to douse the heat. The lassi was too sour and after 2-3 sips, they could no longer take it. Cursing their fate, they paid the bill and left for home.

The evening had left them with a bad taste in their mouth and a rapidly expanding hole in their stomach. The lady proceeded to warm the pizza leftovers and Mi-lord proceeded to make coffee (his only saving grace in the kitchen) and simultaneously raid the pantry/fridge. Finally, the evening that started with plans of an candlelight dinner ended with them having to appease their hunger with a mismatched meal of pizza leftovers, a Spanish omelette, a few cookies and an extra large cup of coffee. If only it had been TinyOwl to their rescue. They could have chosen the restaurant and cuisine even as they watched the movie and the food would have been delivered to their doorstep at their preferred time. But since this incident happened in the dark ages before the Apps appeared on the scene, our couple endured this horror and lived to narrate their story

Take precaution to save yourself from such a disaster and download the app for your Android (click here) and iOS phone (click here) respectively. Issued in interest of all netizen's convenience.